The Life of a Ladybug

live with intention. walk to the edge. listen hard. practice wellness. play with abandon. laugh. choose with no regret. continue to learn. appreciate your friends. do what you love. live as if this is all there is. -mary anne radmacher

Thursday, June 22, 2006

List Friday: 5 Shows I Would Never Be On

1. Solitary. I just discovered this reality show on the Fox Reality network. It is the creepiest reality show yet. It's all run by this "computer" with the creepiest, metallicized voice. It's like the midget lady from Poltergeist's voice, if it was computerized - if you can imagine that. The contestants aren't really competing against one another, so much - they're more competing against themselves and seeing how much torture they can take. The show puts them through all these awful "tasks" - they're really like guinea pigs. They make them go for days without eating and sleeping and then have to perform feats of mental prowess. It's really kind of scary and awful and yet I can't turn away. I would never, never in life be on that show. 2. Survivor. Yeah, camping is not for me. Particularly when it's done on a raging hot island in the middle of nowhere, where you're bound to get bitten by a shark, fall into some fire, get a raging case of IBS, or some such nonsense. Besides which, I'm so not up for physical feats. And I would be voted off with the quickness - either for refusing to do much around camp because ... starting a fire, eating dirt, farming for bugs ... not so much ... or because everyone would hate me. I would tell them right to their faces how I felt about them because I wouldn't be able to help myself and they would send my happy butt right back to Baltimore, which would be just fine with me. 3. Big Brother: All Stars. Not because I wouldn't want to, but because Kaysar might be voted back in and then I would have to attack him and pin him down and plant kisses all over him and play with his pretty, pretty hair and they would have to forcibly remove me and not allow me back on the premises. And probably charge me with stalking and make me have to stay a hundred feet away from him at all times. I would still find a way to charter a plane to fly over the house, trailing a banner that proclaims, "Kaysar, I love you!" He would be on his prayer rug in a minute, begging Allah to rid him of the nuisance that is me. 4. Hell's Kitchen. Because I would have to slap that chef in the face. He's nasty for no reason whatsoever. Calling people "donkey????" Come on! 5. The View. I would choke Star Jones on the first day. Or Rosie. One or the other ... or both.


At June 22, 2006 11:58 AM, Anonymous Punky said...

Toya...It's amazing how you can find time to watch all of these shows with your busy're amazing! Oh,and Happy Anniversary!!

At June 22, 2006 12:32 PM, Anonymous Mrs. Pom said...

I love this list, Toya! A couple will be on mine, too. Esp that crazy Hell's Kitchen guy.

Thanks for playing!

Mrs. Pom

At June 22, 2006 1:19 PM, Blogger Tonyette said...

It's funny because when I saw the previews for Solitary, I was thinking "that's probably the reality show I WOULD go on!" Staying awake for days AND being alone for days at a time, I was thinking "I've SO got this! This is stuff I do for FUN anyway! LOL!

At June 22, 2006 2:25 PM, Blogger Toya said...

TiVo is the best invention ever. If I didn't have it, I'd never see any of the shows I like.

Mrs. Pom,
Glad you like it - I'm looking forward to reading yours.

You're crazy.


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